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How not to get raped

30 Nov

Don’t dress like a slut. Whether you’re going to work, walking the dog, nipping out to Tesco’s, jogging, going out for a walk, to a friend’s house, a night out, your boyfriend’s house, the cinema, the gym, the doctor’s, make sure you aren’t dressing like a slut, you slut. (Even though there’s no evidence that seeing an inch of cleavage turns a normal dude into a rabid monster who will attack you.)

However, research has shown that attackers go for women whose clothes can be easily removed (like loose, baggy clothes or clothes with zips.) So, don’t wear loose clothes either – wear tight clothes. Which may look slutty. You slut.

Don’t walk alone at night – are you an idiot as well as a slut? Get a man to walk you home because women aren’t able to fend for themselves and should rely on men.

However, most rape victims are raped by friends, acquaintances, family and partners. So don’t ask your friend or date to walk you home, or they might rape you. Which would be your fault, you brazen whore.

As we’ve already learned, you are in danger from family, friends and acquaintances. You can protect yourself by:

Being born to a lone mother with no male relatives or other male children. This takes care of possible paedophilia or incest from your family.

Not talking to any of your fellow male pupils, students or coworkers so they don’t become friends or acquaintances and rape you. You might get referred to psychiatric services, lose all your friends or get fired, but it’s a small price to pay for being safe

Another risk comes in the form of date-rape. You should avoid this by not dating, and instead having one-night stands with strangers.

An important thing to remember is that although most victims are attacked by someone they know, you can still be attacked by a stranger. So don’t go out anywhere, because anywhere you go, you could meet a stranger.

However, if a rapist breaks into your house they could attack you there. Living with your partner or parents is no help either, as it is common for women to be attacked in their own homes by friends or family. So, really, you shouldn’t have been born female.

Though transitioning to being a man isn’t any help, because men get raped too – by women and by men.

So there is absolutely NOTHING you can do to prevent rape. Everything you do to avoid it brings its own risks.

Above all: be ready to shag absolutely anyone, because if you’re consenting then it isn’t rape so you can’t be raped. May the sluttiest woman win.

And remember, if you do get raped, it’s your fault for being a slut and you shouldn’t be ruining the rapist’s life by daring to out him or report him to the police. Because it was all your fault, slut.

***There is nothing you can do to avoid it, and why should you even try? It’s the rapist’s responsibility to ensure he doesn’t rape.***

 

 
3 Comments

Posted by on November 30, 2012 in Feminism

 

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

3 responses to “How not to get raped

  1. lacunamalachi

    November 30, 2012 at 10:07 am

    It’s obviously an absolute tragedy for men that we’re all absolutely incapable of controlling ourselves around women who dress in slutty clothes and/or baggy clothes. And that we can’t do anything else but attack when confronted with a woman who is drunk, flirty, sober, ignoring us or brazenly walking down the street.

    At least, I’m presuming that’s the case, otherwise why else would everyone focus on how not to be raped rather than the seemingly more obvious, stop raping?

    Great post thank you.

     
    • Kalika Gold: VirginWhore

      December 1, 2012 at 3:05 am

      Great comment, and thank you! Yes, it is very insulting to men. If I had a son, I wouldn’t think he would rape a woman just because her clothes had been manufactured/cut in such a way that he could see her legs, or cleavage, or arms, shoulders…(or that they were baggy clothes) so why should I think that of other men?

       
  2. SexyLittleIdeas.com

    December 14, 2012 at 8:11 pm

    Ha, great post. I guess there’s no way to avoid getting raped 😦

     

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